David Foster Wallace: This is Water

KENYON COLLEGE COMMENCEMENT ADDRESS

David Foster Wallace:
This Is Water

May 21, 2005 · ~23 Minutes Lecture · ~8 Minutes Reading Time
🧠 Awareness and Attention 🤝 Empathy and Compassion 🌊 Freedom and Choice
















THE OPENING PARABLE

Two young fish are swimming along. They happen to meet an older fish swimming the other way, who nods at them and says:

"Morning, Boys. How's the Water?"

One of the young fish looks over at the other and asks: "What the hell is water?" This is the opening of what would become one of the most widely shared commencement addresses of all time — a 23-minute meditation on awareness, choice, and what it really means to be educated.

🐠
The Older Fish
Aware of the water — the obvious, vital realities we swim in
🐟
The Young Fish
"What the hell is water?" — the default state of unconsciousness
💧
The Water
The invisible systems of meaning we must learn to see

The point of the fish story is that the most obvious, important realities are often the ones that are the hardest to see and talk about.

What a Liberal Arts Education Actually Teaches

Wallace opens by gently demolishing the standard commencement address. He isn't going to tell the graduates to be themselves or follow their dreams. Instead, he argues that the real value of a liberal arts education has nothing to do with knowledge and everything to do with awareness — the simple, conscious choice of what to pay attention to, and how to construct meaning from the relentless stream of daily experience.

He reframes the purpose of education around a single, devastating insight: our natural "default setting" is a deep, unconscious self-centeredness in which we are the absolute center of the universe. Education, properly understood, is the lifelong discipline of learning to adjust that setting — to choose awareness over autopilot, compassion over frustration, attention over the endless chatter of self.

💡 Wallace's Central Claim

Learning how to think really means learning how to exercise some control over how and what you think. It means being conscious and aware enough to choose what you pay attention to and to choose how you construct meaning from experience.

The Deep Belief That You Are the Center of the Universe

Wallace names the invisible force that governs nearly all of adult life: an automatic, hard-wired certainty that we are at the center of everything. It is not a moral failing. It is, as he puts it, our "default setting" — a lens through which we filter every experience without knowing it's there. Everything you see is in front of you. Your hunger, your fatigue, your frustration: all immediate, urgent, real. Other people's inner lives have to be communicated to you somehow; yours just are.

How the Default Setting Works

Your experience of the world is structured so that you are automatically, effortlessly at the center of it. This isn't selfishness in any conventional sense — it's the architecture of consciousness itself.

👁️
The world is in front of you
📺
On your screen, in your ears
💭
Your feelings are immediate
🗣️
Others' must be communicated

This isn't a moral failing — it's our factory setting. The work is learning to adjust it.

100%
of your experience

is processed through the lens of "me" — automatically, constantly, without your choosing it.

0
Conscious Effort Required

The default runs on autopilot. Adjusting it takes discipline, attention, and the kind of awareness that education is supposed to teach.

Think of the old cliché about the mind being an excellent servant but a terrible master. Like most clichés, it's dead on.

David Foster Wallace
Where the Abstract Becomes Brutally Concrete

Wallace does something no commencement speaker ever does: he talks about the supermarket. Not as a metaphor, but as the actual, literal place where you will spend a significant portion of your adult life — tired, frustrated, surrounded by people who seem to be in your way. This is where the real work of "choosing how to think" plays out: not in grand philosophical moments, but in the daily, crushing grind of adult existence.

A Day in the Trenches of Adult Life

💼
The Job
Eight or ten hours of challenging, tedious work
🚗
The Commute
Terrible, slow, bumper-to-bumper traffic
🛒
The Store
Hideous fluorescent lighting, confusing aisles
😤
The Line
Long, slow, everyone in your way
🧠
The Choice
What do you think about all these people?

This is not a metaphor. It will happen, over and over, for the rest of your life. The question is what you do with your mind while it's happening.

The Default Response
🔴

Unconscious Reaction

  • Everyone is in my way — stupid, cow-like, dead-eyed
  • The SUV in the left lane is selfish, wasteful, disgusting
  • The lady screaming at her kid in the checkout line is repulsive
  • This is all personally unfair to me
  • I am the center of this miserable experience
The Conscious Choice
🟢

Aware Response

  • Maybe the SUV driver was in a horrible accident and needs to feel safe
  • Maybe the lady screaming at her kid has been up three nights straight
  • Maybe the slow old person in front of me is as tired as I am
  • Everyone here has an inner life as complex as mine
  • I can choose to experience this differently
🔑 The Shift

None of these compassionate interpretations are likely. But neither are they impossible. It just depends what you want to consider. If you're automatically sure that you know what reality is, and you're operating on your default setting, then you, like me, probably won't consider possibilities that aren't annoying and miserable.

Everybody Worships. The Only Choice Is What to Worship.

Wallace's most haunting passage concerns worship. Not religious worship — something deeper, more involuntary. He argues that there is no such thing as atheism when it comes to the question of what we devote ourselves to. Everyone worships. The only choice we get is what to worship. And the insidious thing about the unconscious forms of worship is not that they're evil or sinful — it's that they operate on our default setting, eating us alive, day after day, without our ever knowing it happened.

💰

Worship Money & Things

You will never have enough. You will never feel you have enough. It will devour you whole without your ever noticing it's happening.

🪞

Worship Your Body & Beauty

You will always feel ugly. And when time and age start showing, you will die a million deaths before they finally grieve you.

Worship Power

You will end up feeling weak and afraid, and you will need ever more power over others to numb you to your own fear.

🧠

Worship Your Intellect

You will end up feeling stupid, a fraud, always on the verge of being found out.

⚠️ Wallace's Warning

These forms of worship are not sinful or evil. They are unconscious. They are default settings. They're the kind of worship you just gradually slip into, day after day, getting more and more selective about what you see and how you measure value — without ever being fully aware that that's what you're doing.

The Freedom That Is Most Precious Is the One Nobody Talks About

Wallace draws a final, devastating distinction between two kinds of freedom. The freedom advertised by consumer culture — to be lords of our tiny skull-sized kingdoms, to pursue whatever we want without impediment — and the real freedom, which involves attention, awareness, discipline, and the capacity to truly care about other people, to sacrifice for them over and over in myriad petty, unsexy ways, every day.

The Advertised Freedom
👑

Skull-Sized Kingdoms

  • Freedom to be lords of our own tiny domains
  • Alone at the center of all creation
  • Free to want, pursue, and achieve without interference
  • The freedom of the default setting — automatic, unconscious
The Real Freedom
🌊

Attention & Discipline

  • Attention, awareness, and conscious effort
  • Being able truly to care about other people
  • Sacrificing in myriad petty, unsexy ways, every day
  • Choosing what to think — this is the real capital-T Truth

The really important kind of freedom involves attention and awareness and discipline, and being able truly to care about other people and to sacrifice for them over and over in myriad petty, unsexy ways every day.

On Real Freedom
Three Threads Woven Through the Entire Address
👁️

Awareness

The most obvious, important realities are hidden in plain sight. Staying conscious and alive in the adult world — day in, day out — is unimaginably hard and the work of a lifetime.

🔀

Choice

You get to decide how to construct meaning from experience. You get to consciously decide what has meaning and what doesn't. This is the freedom of a real education.

🤝

Empathy

The daily discipline of adjusting your default setting — moving from automatic self-centeredness toward genuine, hard-won attention to others and their invisible inner lives.

How Wallace Builds His Argument

The speech is structured as a slow, carefully constructed argument that moves from parable to philosophy to the brutally mundane, and then back to something approaching the sacred. Here's the path it traces:

Opening
The Fish Parable
Two young fish don't know what water is. An older fish does. The most obvious, important realities are the ones hardest to see — because they surround us completely.
Act I
The Default Setting
We are hard-wired to be the center of our own universe. Everything we experience is filtered through the lens of self. This is not evil — it's our factory setting.
Act II
The Supermarket
The abstract becomes concrete. The traffic, the crowds, the frustration — this is where the real work of choosing plays out, not in grand moments but in the daily grind.
Act III
The Warning About Worship
Everybody worships. The unconscious forms of worship — money, beauty, power, intellect — will consume you without your ever knowing it happened.
Closing
Real Freedom & "This Is Water"
The really important kind of freedom is attention, awareness, and discipline. It is the disciplined, daily practice of paying attention — to others, to what's hidden in plain sight, to the water all around us.
🌊

This Is Water.
This Is Water.

It is unimaginably hard to do this, to stay conscious and alive in the adult world day in and day out. Your education really is the job of a lifetime. And it commences: now. I wish you way more than luck.

In His Own Words

The capital-T Truth is about life BEFORE death. It is about the real value of a real education, which has almost nothing to do with knowledge, and everything to do with simple awareness.

On the Purpose of Education

Everything in my own immediate experience supports my deep belief that I am the absolute center of the universe.

On the default setting

Worship power, you will end up feeling weak and afraid, and you will need ever more power over others to numb you to your own fear.

On unconscious worship

It is about the real value of a real education, which has almost nothing to do with knowledge, and everything to do with simple awareness.

On what education really teaches
Watch the Full Address
David Foster Wallace — This Is Water
Kenyon College · May 21, 2005 · ~23 minutes
Watch Now
Previous
Previous

Charlie Munger on the Psychology of Human Misjudgment

Next
Next

Richard Feynman on the Pleasure of Finding Things Out